I have stories and very likely so do you. I’ll tell a few at the end of this article. But first: The pit in your stomach every Monday morning. The way your shoulders tense when you see their name in your inbox. The sick feeling when they walk into the conference room.
Workplace bullying isn’t just uncomfortable – it’s career poison that seeps into everything you do.
Here’s what actually works when you’re being targeted:
Document everything, immediately
Screenshots of emails. Written summaries of conversations with timestamps. Names of witnesses. This isn’t paranoia – it’s protection. Most HR departments need patterns, not isolated incidents.
Stop trying to “fix” them
You can’t reason with someone who enjoys making others uncomfortable. They’re not misunderstood – they’re strategic. Your energy goes into protecting yourself, not changing them.
Master the gray rock method
[Email readers, continue here] Become boring. One-word answers. No emotional reactions. No personal information. Bullies feed on drama and emotional responses. Starve them of what they want.
Build your coalition quietly
Connect with colleagues who’ve witnessed the behavior. You’re rarely their only target. These allies become crucial if you need to escalate.
Know your company’s process
Every organization has procedures for reporting harassment. Know them cold. When you’re ready to act, you won’t be scrambling to figure out next steps.
Set your boundaries in writing
“I need you to stop interrupting me during meetings.” “That tone isn’t professional, and I won’t continue this conversation if it continues.” Clear. Direct. Documented. Your mental health is worth more than any job.
The hardest truth? Some workplaces are toxic from the top down. You can’t fix a culture that rewards bullies or ignores their behavior.
But you can protect yourself. You can document everything. You can build support. And you can choose environments where you’re valued, not targeted.
Your peace of mind isn’t negotiable.
My stories of bullies encountered over the years
Recently I attended a board meeting where a recently added member representing his class of shareholders who bombarded the board with “suggestions” for improvement of technology, operations, security and more, all without notice or advance concurrence from discussions with other individuals. Even after attending the meeting, reading those minutes made me cringe. They read like a one-person diatribe with board members in a totally reactionary mode. No board concurrence, and I’d guess considerable board member agata from the barrage. I’d label this as unproductive and divisionary, even if the bully was right in every respect.
In a separate incident, I recall with clarity being summoned as CEO to an unannounced meeting with all fourteen of my vice presidents and country managers, who stated that if I did not fire the sales vice president bully that each of them would resign from my (fast growing) company. I had brought along with me an industrial psychologist, sensing that this was not to be a casual meeting, unannounced as it was. After a half hour of hearing each person’s grievances, and after a two minute meeting in the hall with the industrial psychologist, I returned with a “yes” and immediately recalled the bully from his international trip, firing him but rewarding him with a large cash bonus for his important role in the company’s growth – satisfying everyone including the bully who owned up to his behavior at this company and previous companies.
Dealing with bullies is unpleasant but necessary in your work environment!
*Drawing from insights shared at Berkonomics and five decades of backing entrepreneurs who understood that true competitive advantage can’t be purchased at a discount.* Image created using DALL-E3.
Excellent info.